I still get butterflies in my tummy when I think of you.

I still smile at your texts like if it’s the first time.

I still act like a retard when I’m anywhere near you.

I still wish to be with you.

I still would give anything for our endless conversations.

I still want you.

I still have feelings for you.

I still want to give us a chance.

I still want to keep trying for us.

I remember everything. How we met, how we started talking, all the little things you’d say or do :)
-Can’t believe we’ve been talking for so long, it almost seems unreal. About 9 months now… and still nothing. But I’ve loved every conversation we’ve had. I appreciated seeing you, even for a little bit of time.

I guess only time can tell. Better safe than sorry. It’s like that story with the Rabbit and the Turtle! We all know the turtle was the slowest… but it actually made it until the end… With that being said, I don’t want to rush anything. I’ll just let it flow, and from now on, I have to keep it on the down low.

I did not say LOVE!

I take it back! I do not love you! That word is not in my vocabulary. I know I like you,  I like you a lot. But love is over rated, I don’t think it’s within my range. I guess you ‘don’t know’ if you’re in love, and I’m sorry if I’m supposed to know, but I don’t know either. I want to say know, but there’s a part of me that keeps insisting I am… fuck.

I hate you but I love you.

I hate these feelings but I couldn’t live without them.

I feel betrayed but I feel like I can trust you

I feel things that I maybe shouldn’t feel

I feel stupid

It was whatever.

I hate seeing people that remind me of him.

You know when you’re staring at a picture and they just bring back so many memories?…

Yeah, I hate that too.

I hate the fact that I can’t see you, I can’t be with you, I can’t make this work.

I hate the fact that everyone else can always make it work, while I try to figure out ways of at least talking to you for a bit.

I hate how all these doubts arouse from out of nowhere.

I hate how there’s nothing about it I can do.

I hate these feelings, just because they can’t be expressed.

I swear I’m going crazy, I don’t know what I’m gonna do.

I hate you, yet I love talking to you.

I hate these feelings, but I can’t get rid of them

I hate how your the first thing that pops into my head, but yet these memories I don’t want to forget.

I just hate everything that has to do with you…

But I would hate it even more, if I had nothing to do with you.

So… stay.

I feel like giving up.

I honestly don’t see this going anywhere.

We talk 24/7.

The feelings are there, they’re mutual.

But, honestly, is this even going anywhere?

Last time I saw you was probably about a month ago.

The times I see you are very rare.

So really, is this going anywhere?

I feel like giving up.

I feel like we don’t have a chance.

So I can give up right now, or keep fighting for what I want.

It’s weird how these feelings came about.

It’s even weirder how they’ve been here for so long.

But this is moving just so slow, it makes me think the feelings are already gone.

I guess I could keep fighting, and give it one more try.

I don’t want to give up on us.

I want this to get somewhere, but what if we can’t make it work?

I guess it’s up to time, and that’s what’s going to tell

Where this is going,

If feeling are still showing.

Cus honestly, right now, I don’t see where this is going…

See, the thing is, I don’t have many followers on Tumblr but that’s what makes it better, because I get to vent, I get to ACTUALLY say what’s on my mind; and the whole world doesn’t have to know about it, just the few people that follow me. So, there’s kind of an upside to not having many followers! :D and I like it, it’s my way of venting out! :)

that means I can start venting again and no one can tell me nadaaaa! yess! oh Tumblr how I’ve missed you! :D

So ash Wednesday is tomorrow, therefore, lent is about to start so this year I have decided to give up all of the following:

Facebook

Twitter

Tumblr

and all other forms of internet social pages…

for 40 days! :o

It’s going to be hard but I’m doing it! 

So since I’m not going to be on this thing for a while feel free to text me or send me a letter :)

Bye!!!